Alisha I’m so sorry to hear you went through that… both your loss and the way you were treated by your doula. I suffered from a miscarriage as have many of my friends, and I know how devastating it is. To have someone that you trusted enough to allow them be in your birth space show that lack of feeling is horrific. As with all professions, I’m sure there are fabulous doulas and horrible ones. I’m sorry that you had a horrible one. I was very lucky to have a doula who was amazing. I would recommend her to anyone.

Big hugs and best wishes,

Crystal

In my excitement at becoming pregnant for the first time, I hired a doula when I was 6 weeks pregnant after the complimentary Skype conversation she advertised on her website.

As any Type-A with a PhD does, I researched her thoroughly and she appeared to be a member of lots of organizations, best doula in Orlando etc.

Unfortunately – two weeks later – I discovered the baby had died at my first OBGYN appointment (missed miscarriage).

Not only was the miscarriage itself traumatic – the doula sent a long email informing me (in capital letters!) that her fee was non-refundable – even though she had only been my “doula” for 2 weeks, we’d never met in person and she’d not provided any services at all.

In the end she refunded half of what I paid her “to bring the matter to a close”, but I remain horrified that I had to agitate for a refund at such a devastating time. The fact that she profited from the miscarriage still turns my stomach.

Caveator emptor!

I became a doula when my daughter had her first (6 years ago). Took all the training, got certified as both birth and post-partum doula, became a Certified Lactation Counselor, and was offered a position at a local hospital IF I would recertify in Canada (a much better program).

Alas, in my local area we got a bad rep due to confusion about midwives and doulas (doulas do NOT catch babies as I see you have noted) when several untrained ‘doulas’ made hideous mistakes which hit the headlines in our papers. It was awful, to say the least.

I could not afford to train in Canada and have not been able to work much as a doula here, but would love to. I have helped a select few over the years, and I am the pit bull type as well, especially after seeing the way my daughter was treated even though she had a wonderful midwife!

I love your story.
Thanks so much for sharing it.

Keep your good work up! You are a blessing.

Thank you so much Whitney for your very kind words. Doula’s are indeed an amazing breed of people. 🙂

Congratulations on the birth of your little girl!

Hugs,

Crystal